So asked one of my peer the other day while we were discussing our interests while coming back from lunch. That question threw me off-guard. We were never really very close; we shared a professional relationship. He being project manager of a product that I was involved as a partner member. Yeah....what did I always wanted to do? Apart from the routine work; which of course feeds my stomach.
I hesitated a bit in replying, I was not sure if I must share what I always wanted to do. It was my passion. Hmm...after keeping mum for a couple of seconds, I told "I wanted to sing". This answer took him by surprise; not sure if he expected this answer from me. I have always been seen as a serious person with no passion for other things.
He paused and collected himself and expressed "Oh really!". Then followed the usual Q&A session. Have you learnt music? Carnatic or light-music? Whats your taste? What is stopping you from pursuing now? I answered all his questions. He was also interested in music. I told I do sing; people hearing me appreciate it but I was not sure if I were good or bad. It's an interest that I need to pursue.
He then told me an incident. It seems his wife also sings. He being a critic, commented on her raagams and expressed disappointment that she didn't do justice to the song. His wife gave him a piece of her mind. "You enjoy what you do as long as you don't analyze it. Once you have knowledge to analyze, then all you can see are flaws. I don't know raagas, swarams, but I enjoy when I sing. But since you have knowledge about them, you can see only flaws which stops you from enjoying"
Hmmmm...makes sense. I never really bothered asking anyone their comments whenever I croon, bray or whatever that can be called. OK let me call my crooning as "SINGING"; for my satisfaction. I enjoy to my heart's content when I sing.
Then my peer asked me to sing a couple of lines of "Yengaey yenathu kavithai...". Till then our chauffeur; Satish(oops...if satish ever reads my blog, he is sure gonna beat me up for calling him chauffeur) was quiet with his complete concentration on Bangalore's busy roads. But when my peer asked me to sing, Satish expressed concern. He told he wasn't prepared to take this punishment.
Satish and I used to go to work together when both of us were in California. We used to go out together sight-seeing and also to movies and dinners. Satish had enough of it. He had to put up with my singing for 3 months and he wasn't ready one more time.
Yeah, I told my peer that I had sore throat and was indeed coughing all the way. But he insisted. Ugh...muttered Satish. Much to his disappointment and my peer's excitement, I sang a couple of lines, my peer joined in too. He sang well, according to me.
I also sang a couple of more songs. I guess I was able to sing even with bad cough. Yuppie....we reached office, Satish was happy
Hmm...well Satish finally acknowledged that I SING well. Wow...I can sing...
I don't know what my peer felt. While parting, he told me "You should pursue; learn music. If you are so interested, you should consider quitting your job to learn music"..
Oh my God!!!!!! Quit my work. Oops...
But yes, I would pursue my passion; sometime in future. We all have something that we always want to do; but we don't pursue. Lack of time, work, family, pressure, stress, traffic, boss, fear, laziness.....The reasons can be endless. Hm....I hope to write about pursuing my passion sometime later.