Friday, July 3, 2009

3 years only.....

AS was asking me why there were no posts and I was told "Write something gal!"

I had hectic work schedule; as usual and I was sick too. So could not really take time to write. Amidst all these, I had a wedding to attend - wedding of an important person - my mentor's.

He was my guide when I first joined work; still a freshie; just out of college about 4 years back. I approached him for all my issues related to work, he was my guide, philosopher and friend. Eventually, I started discussing my personal issues too and he would be there to listen.

To vent out my anger, to crib, to complain, to irritate, to scold, the first number to dial would be his. I sort of; was his CASE STUDY as he would say to implement his psychological leanings.

I shared a good friendly relationship. He got busy in his new world once he got engaged about 3 months back. Few days before that, this is what he said as a parting thought when we met one day - "I may not be there, all the time"

It was few days later when he got engaged and I realized what he meant.

We are social beings, constantly looking out for compatible people with whom we can strike a chord, build a rapport. Its tough to find friends who can put up with you, share your sorrows and joys and encourage you and be there when you need them.

I was recalling all the friendships that I have had since my kindergarten. There was one thing that was common. I am generally a reserved person, and cant mingle easily. Most times, I have had just one friend to whom I would stick from dawn to dusk. If that friend is not present for some reason, then I could just skip my lunch and withdraw, for the very fact that I couldn't mingle easily.

These one friend at a time at various stages in my life have lasted for not more than 3 years. Surreal but true. Excited to find a friend with whom you can spend good and bad times, share joys and sorrows, bond, go on and suddenly drift away.

And why does it always happen after around 3 years? A friend in school left for another school after having spent 3 years, a friend in college just drifted away at the end of 3 year - due to misunderstanding. I regret it even today. A friend at my workplace moved away for his higher studies. There are a couple of other friends who drifted away - in search of new career, fresh life and so on....

The essence gradually fades away. Now its my mentor. I am in touch with all of these friends, I can still talk to my mentor but it will not be the same., i cant play around, crib, complain.... Things in life change, priority change, each one gets busier as the day passes.

So what I realized was shelf life of friendship in my life was 3 years....Tadaaaaaaaaaaaa.....

They remain friends forever, yet..............................................


  1. can totally relate to this.. had been mentally attached to lot of people in the my journey in life.. lessons learnt.. liked the way you put it.. simple yet strong

  2. hii sis

    nice post yaar :)

    life keeps on changing every 3-4 yrs, the only thing constant is change, and it has to be accepted b'coz its inevitable :)

  3. Hi Chriz,

    Thanks :-) Tough part is to detach ourselves, its a pain but we move on

  4. Heiyya sista,

    Very very true. Changes are inevitable. One of my friend always says "Life is a journey. We meet people and they go away. You should move on"

  5. Super. Friends are God's way of taking care of us.

  6. Hey Mano,

    Wow, those were beautiful words. Gave a whole new meaning to friendship :-)

  7. hey! thnx for dropping by my blog :) ..

    This post of yours is superb! so true when you spoke about the time when you lost a friend due to misunderstanding. Looking back we would today realize that had we spoke out or tried to reach out things would have been different.. but then things in retrospect always turn out to be right.

    I think every relationship has its share of wonderful times in our lives, they leave impressions and change our lives in some ways.

    "Who finds a faithful friend, finds a treasure."

    so true.. aint it!


  8. Hi raMmY,

    :-) Pleasure is mine.

    Very true. Recalling those times, we feel sad for the time lost and the mistakes done. Getting back is one thing, getting back at the right time is another thing. I did get back to my friend with whom I had a misunderstanding. Not very late, but a bit late but she was in no mood to patch up..

    Anyways, as you said, each relationship leaves a lasting impression on us, teaches us few things and impacts our lives in some way or the other.

  9. good one yaar...initially i had been through took me atleast a year or 2 to realize that while you may have those 'best friends forever', we need to mingle with everybody and remain less attached to that 'best friend forever'

  10. Hi Gayathri,

    Thanks yaar. Yeah, even though we know we should let go, yet we end up with such things. Human behavior :-)


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