Sunday, July 24, 2011

My Joys

"How do you feel about staying in your newly owned flat? " a friend asked me.

"Yeah.......OK" I replied nonchalantly.

He was surprised at my disinterested response. He made me realize my lackadaisical reaction and asked further if I am not excited about the new house. I suddenly felt uncomfortable. How was I supposed to react? Was I not happy about the house I bought with my hard earned money? Yeah I was, yet why was that excitement and that exhilaration missing in me?

"Do you know what you have accomplished?" he tried again to bring that euphoria in me. I just kept numb. I really dont know. Was it that I was taking my blessing for granted? Is it my attitude; supported by a steady income? Didnt I care for my 'achievement'? Is it because I had it easy in my life?

No, I didnt have it easy in my life. I did not have beyond 5 Rs during school. My parents didnt give me pocket money; that Rs 5 was for emergency situations. I bought my first cellphone with my first salary. I bought my car with my hard earned money. I didnt inherit anything; that has made me more capable and independent.

So, is it the attitude? I am capable sorts? What if that MNC had not offered me my dream job the moment I applied for it? I had no other choice, no other networks or contacts. I did not have a backup offer or a backup plan. I didnt need any other choice :) I knew they found me; they need me. Now is this attitude? Whatever I have achieved, its due to me sheer hard work and dedication. That blind gutsy feeling that I can accomplish sails me through rough seas.

What would give me true euphoria if not my own house or my luxury sedan?

Is it discovering that beautiful orange mushroom 'Cocaina' as I trekked in the rain forests of Costa Rica? Is it watching the fog playing hide and seek at the Jog falls. Is it the feeling of the star fish wriggling at my touch in the white beaches of Mauritius. Or is it walking on the road while it was pouring heavily and others under shelter watching me and wondering if I was sane?

Is it the girly giggle I had 5 years ago when a Japanese at the Singapore airport told me I was pretty and gave me a lollipop and helped me with my baggage and parted with a hug? Or is it that when someone who chose to not keep in touch with me pops up a day and thanks me profusely for the support and parts with a "You are really a nice person".

Or when the dog wags its tail in gratitude or when the cat purrs seeing you back home and snuggles in your lap? Or when my manager gives me a huge responsibility and says he believes that I can deliver it? Or when that little girl comes over and we share a tiny piece of diary milk? Or when I found a travel magazine to read when I was locked out of my house for 3 hours? Or when I finally managed to find a rain stick and bought it? Or when I demand for that extra strawberry sauce topping on my ice cream and relish it without any sense of the surrounding?

I cant pick one from here. Each of these incidents has delighted me; it has given me that sense of euphoria which I did not get when I sat inside my newly bought car or when I bought my flat. For me joy is in simple things life has to offer....

The cocaina and the travel magazine and the fog and the lollipop......For me, joy is in finding that rain stick, getting drenched in rain, in the dog's wagging, in the cat's purring, in relishing the strawberry sauce............

Am I crazy to not value what I possess in materials? Is it because I am getting them easy. I dont know; but joy to me are not from material things. Next time, dont ask me how I feel about driving an auto transmission luxury sedan. I am just going to shrug it off.


  1. Nice one Insignia. Happiness is being satisfied with what we got. As I said several times before, never have emotional attached with your home. It is only an investment.

  2. Thats familiar terrain. Stuff that i get whacked for often !

    I thought there are only a few like this. glad i found another !


  3. Joys are not from material things I agree but there are some very dear and pleasant memories related with some of these material things and hence I tend to cherish them! :)

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  5. oooff. it was like a sharp arrow straight from your heart aimed at the readers...

  6. Do not be vexed if such questions pour forth. There are people who can find pleasure in and value the seemingly simple things in life - things that make up life. And then there are those who are unaware or indifferent to such simple joys. For them, the status symbols, the symbols of achievement are the only things to gloat about. Nothing wrong in that, of course. But they do miss out a lot, you know.

    A post to remember.

  7. I really don't know what to write today.It was so touching.

    What I could relate is the pocket money you got and the hard earned money you have now.And what I value and believe is the journey from the 5 rupees pocket money to the flat you own now.The complete and comprehensive outlook of your life.That's what matters.

    Yet,I don't want to shrug it off.Since this is a material world and at least in front of the so called world I am a material girl.The hard work and it's fruitful reward is giving you the space and freedom in life today to enjoy the simple things in life.If you were struggling still I think these small pleasures won't be worth like what you expressed here.To me,what I admire is the hard-working woman in you who could challenge this world with the 'materials' they always bargain for and thus find your space and freedom..and yes,still can write about the simple pleasures of life !

  8. "It's the simple things in life that are the most extraordinary."
    — Paulo Coelho
    Can only say ,straight from my heart - so happy that i met you :)

  9. I win again. Havent I said this before that you are amongst the best bloggers in town.You write so well.
    Take my word.Nothing comes easy in life.Its struggle,compitance,will to succeed.Times have changed.In early days,owning a house was the divine blessing and the whole town got to know of it.
    Enjoy your posessions

  10. That pocket money reminds me of my pocket money during graduation :P , looking at generation now i feel how easily they get things .Totally agree with your take on house.I don't know how i will react when i will buy a house. Will i be happy for owning a house or afraid of paying a huge emi for the rest of my life :P.

  11. B, this a Post that will stand apart. Because it answers the many silly questions people throw at another.

    If possessing can make me happy then there will be quite a many in the world who will be jumping with euphoria.I'm certain Mr Ambani may not be sleeping well in his skyscraper mansion with the birds view of the slums of Mumbai. He may also have not discovered the peacefulness in lying out on the terrace at night and fall asleep gazing at the starry sky.

    Well happiness is relative isn't it?

    Does not having nothing make one happy? I do not think that possessing can make one happily satisfied. When we yearn and possess something don't we want to catch hold of something else.

    Well it is also easy to suggest, be happy in the little things around. But what might be little will be much to me, and what is great to me is trivial to you?

    But still all said and done , you seemed to have found the answer, ignore the question when it is thrown at you the next time around.

  12. Bindhu,
    You are finding joy in simple things and not attaching value to great value to materialistic things, that way you will be always cheerful, Good attitude :)

  13. Well written and I bet you meant every word of it.

  14. Isn't happiness a relative term? for that matter, isn't every damn thing a relative term? And every second person judgmental?

    In my case, it happens about career..people always feel that I am career oriented, they are surprised when I say that I have my own firm, so what? Ups and downs of the firm don't affect me much..I enjoy what I do and that's the reason I am a bit successful! But I would any day prefer a peaceful family life. I don't work to earn, to get luxuries of life, I work because I like legal field. The day I lose interest, I will quit it!

    why do I rant on your page these days? Anyway, it's ok to be not excited about things. If you don't have spark in you for certain things, that doesn't make you a dull person!


  15. Your joy in simple things in life.. is more than enough for me to confirm my assumptions that you must be a lovely and beautiful lady :-)

  16. SG,

    Yes SG, I have that on my mind. thank you


    You too? I am glad :)


    Hmm....Memories are the ones that gives you joy; the materials act as catalysts :)


    oops not thats not the intention :)


    Yes Balan, I try to sound normal to fit into their group, but I fail. I decided it was best to be myself.


    Thanks :) Yes, once in college, I walked 5 kms as I didnt have money to pay for the bus. It was summer 2 PM. My college was on a hill top. There were many of my classmates who were driving/riding towards college. No one offered to take me; and now when they send friend request on Facebook; I find it funny :)

    Yes, I agree with you Melange on the material thing. But I cant fit in there. My mom always tries to tell the same, I just cant. If I wnat something; I will acquire it for me; not because I want to show off. Who cares about others. My mom chides me often for this attitude; yet I am recluse.


    Paulo Coelho is my favorite. I can relate to the things he has to say :)

    I am glad I met wonderful people like you :)

    Chowla sir,

    You made my day :) Thanks, such encouragement is needed time and again.

    Thank you.


    Haha dont think about EMI while buying; you will never buy :-D


    :-) Glad you agree that people ask silly questions. But for them, we are crazy

    Bang on Anil. Since the time I read about Ambani's skyscraper; I cant help but wonder if he can lead a peaceful and luxurious life while seeing the struggle and poverty around. I bet he cant. Yeah you sent me the mail about his 20 million euros yacht. :) What to say

    Happiness is relative, whats precious for me might be silly for someone else. But thats how I am :)


    :-) Thank you


    Welcome to B Log :)
    I am honest with what I write; yes I meant every word :)

    Keep visiting.


    Yes, it is.

    Thats ok, at least you rant :-P

    Take care


    Haa :) thanks lady. I hope I wont disappoint you.

  17. Thats why you are a better human being and a lovely person then most.

    I must admit that my first want when i landed in uk was to get myown house .. and I did strugle ver hard and put in lots of hours to get one .. and Yes i do tell people that I have a house of my own..
    because back home its own house and all, though we have a big hosue but end of the day that was my grand dads then my dad's .. It was not my own ..

    I guess you have your chosie you get excited and happy over different things as you mentioned the hug, the lollipop .. I guess each person is different ..

    To me it have never been excited about cars, I got two but for somereason people keep saying i shud get a BMW or a audi or this or that but truthfully it has not excited me at all.. I felt the same excitement when i bought my motorbike or my first second car , it takes me from a to b simple ..


  18. Hey,

    Are you referring to me as I asked you about your new apartment?

    Different people feel happy with different things. I feel owning home (does not matter small or big) is a big accomplishment especially when you start with 5RS as emergency fund.

    It is not the walls of the house or decor or cost or investment or house's value after few years. For me:-

    1. You accomplished a milestone.
    2. You can make a home out of it.

    That is what gives me happiness from apartment perspective.

  19. Lovely post.

    But, learn to show off. Develop show ego and make others jealous as well.
    Live life like others as well sometimes.

  20. Wow and though a person thinks that he/she has arrived when they own their house, it is the small things along the way that make life worthwhile. I only feel that you know how to cherish and find happiness. I recently read that happiness is found within. You are on the right path. I loved the wonderful small incidents that you shared with us. And, I am itching to ask why lollipop? Were you that young then?

  21. maybe its in our nature... u seems to be capable of doing whatever you want to do... so maybe it was not something unexpected that you bought a new home but still people expect you to be over joyous and happy over it..after all if one lives in a society one has to pretend :)

  22. It's perfectly normal in my opinion. Sometimes, big things don't excite me as much as little things does.

  23. Bik,

    Thanks. Yeah it differs.


    Not you :)

    Yes, I can make a home out of it. But I really fail to get excited as others expect me to


    Thank you.

    I tried, but fail miserably. I cant show off; thats the problem. I feel stupid in front of others.

    Ego, hmm I feel I need to build it. I am very nice to people and it backfires.


    Yup :) Haha I was 22 then. I did look like a school girl. that man was too sweet. It was in Singapore that we met; he readily gave me a lollipop :)

    I was coming down from San Francisco after 4 months stay. I had 23x2 kgs of luggage + 10 kg cabin and laptop. He helped me in Bangalore airport by putting my luggage on the cart.

    Muhammad Israr,

    Welcome to B Log

    They expect, thats fine. But I cant be excited about it as I would be excited about..say..landing in Tierra del Fuego. Thats my nature.

    Thats one thing I cant do - pretend to fit into the society :)

    thank you for your valuable comments.


    Yup :) You got me.

  24. Well, my joys..

    I feel it here, on this page. :)

  25. This is another one of those posts where you inspire me :)

    I'm like the way you just Live all your principles instead of bothering to explain them to everyone.

    PS: Some posts earlier, in the comment I made, I meant to say 'dogs' instead of 'dos'. It was a typo, but seeing your nice response, I though it was better of as 'dos' :)

  26. Makk,

    :-) Glad


    :-) I am glad that I continue to inspire you

    Oh! which post was that? Let me know. I want to revisit that post


I'd love to know what you thought :-) Please shoot!